I have certain adult family members that get upset if they only get 1 present. These same people also complains if they get a lot of (in one family member’s words) small junky stuff.
As an adult, I really don’t care if I get a Christmas gift or not. It’s nice, but 1 Christmas gift per relative is more than enough for me. Heck, a Christmas card from the adults in my family is more than enough for me. One of the biggest reasons I do like to get 1 gift from each family member is because my kids ask why I didn’t get more presents… But 1 present from each family couple is plenty!
Know that just because I don’t really want Christmas presents doesn’t mean I don’t want to get them for other adults (especially my younger, adult sister).
To me, Christmas gift giving is more for the kids. To them, each gift still has that magic quality, especially those presents brought by Santa Claus!
As a small child, I remember waking up around 6:00am excited to go down and rip open packages! The beginning of Christmas morning was always so exciting! But even as a kid, I remember getting tired of opening packages after a while!
So now for me at the current point in my life, Christmas presents are much more of a chore than something to look forward too. With some of my other family members though, it’s almost a competition! I do get a lot of pleasure out of watching my kids open their presents though!
Do you still exchange presents with other adult family members? If so, how many presents do you exchange?
Presents, Bah Humbug!
-MR Scrooge (lol)
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Today, I’m going to travel back in time to talk about the Christmas experiences that my grandmother told me about her childhood growing up during “The Great Depression“. Now granted, she was about 4 years at the time The Great Depression started, but she had an iron trap memory, and I think it’s a story worth telling.
Let me start by saying upfront, that stories like the one I’m about to tell you helped formed my frugal habits in life.
Shortly after my grandmother was born, tragedy struck! While driving a dog to friends in Pennsylvania, her dad got stuck on the railroad tracks and was hit and killed by a train. Back then life was different, there wasn’t any government aid to help my grandmother’s mother in cases like this!
So my grandmother really didn’t know much about her dad, all that she told me was that he was a typical middle manager in some manufacturing plant of some sort. But after he died, it didn’t take long for the money that they had to save to evaporate quickly with time…
My grandmother’s mom eventually got a job cleaning houses in which all four kids would help out. It was a hard life from the beginning for my grandmother and her three siblings (2 girls and 1 boy).
Christmas was an especially hard time for the family. They didn’t have any money, and I’ve never heard of any mention of a Christmas Tree in my grandmother’s childhood (I do remember her mentioning Christmas stockings though).
Being the curious kid that I was, I’d ask my grandmother what she got for Christmas. And she would explain to me how instead of gifts, they might get a piece of fruit (an orange), or a piece of candy (no chocolate though). Once she told me that she got a ball and jacks. And another Christmas, she got clothes made from an old drapery that one of the clients that her mom work for was throwing out (the older kids hated these she said, but she didn’t mind so much). This was special because the material of the drapes was an expensive type of material…
Now you might think that she was singing the blues to me, but when I told her how I thought that was horrible, and she said that it really wasn’t, and that’s just how it was back then!
If you were to watch TV, sad music would be playing and the kids would all have glum faces as they come down for Christmas to their nonexistent Christmas tree (no Grinch to have a change of heart and save the day in this story) and they would shed a tear or two, feeling pity for themselves.
But it was never that bad! She said that they would sing and enjoy each other’s company. There was great strength in their family because they knew the world dealt them a bad hand, but they were determined to make the best of it.
I guess that may be why I sometimes route for the underdog and have the Lemons to Lemonade category on my blog…
Being an adult now, I think she sugar-coated it at least a little so I wouldn’t be depressed at Christmas. I’m sure she felt the bitterness and envy that comes with being a smart but poor kid at Christmas. But instead of hating the holiday, she made it one of her favorites! She truly was a brilliant and excellent teacher in my life!
After she was married and had kids, perhaps this is the reason why Christmas was always over the top for her and she tried to make it a great experience for her kids and grandchildren. Her presentation of Christmas was the closest I’ve ever been to experiencing something magical as a child. Not just for the tree and gifts! She would play her organ and have the kids sing Christmas songs.
Perhaps this is also the reason that I put my kids first, and want them to have a step up in life, both personally and financially level.
Thanks for letting me share a bit of my family history and hardships,
MR
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We normally don’t do this because both events are big enough that they should be separate, but we are pressed for time this year.
This time, I decided to do something different with the decision-making process around both traditions! Instead of picking which tree for our house and where to go for Christmas Dinner, I decided to open it up to the kids (my wife and I both have made the decisions in the past). So I let my son pick out the tree this year and my daughter decided where to go for Christmas dinner!
While the tree my son choose wasn’t one that I would have picked, it still was decent enough, and was a fine choice! He had the privilege of cutting it down (lucky him)! However, he chose to cut it down about 6 inches too high, so when we got home, the tree will be the smallest one we ever had (lol). Hopefully, he nor my daughter will notice!
We lucked out with my daughter, she whittled down her choice for the Christmas dinner to the “Fighter Group” restaurant and “Red Lobster“. In the end she decided to stick with tradition and go with the “Fighter Group” restaurant.
So with both Christmas Traditions, I let the kids make the decision as to the direction of the traditions! I think this will be better for their involvement in the process, and help them feel more important!
If you have kids, do you try to promote leadership and decision-making qualities?
-MR
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Christmas was always a special time for me as a kid!
Christmas Tree
It was my grandmother use to make it a very special time of the year. She went all out, she had a large Santa that stood in a sleigh decoration with individual reindeer that she would put on the top of her organ. Beneath the Santa decoration, she had a sheet of white foamy material that looked like snow.
The Christmas tree was put up with silver garland, special fancy homemade ornaments, silver tinsel hanging perfectly straight, and about 3 strings of lights (my grandfather hated to get them working every year). She also put decoration throughout the house, it was magical when I was a small boy. On one special gift for each person that she bought a gift for, she would wrap it so that it would create a wintry or Christmas scene (this was a lot of work).
Most years, my grandfather would go and buy a real fir-tree when I was younger, so the room that the tree was in would have a faint pine tree smell. My grandmother use to play Christmas songs (O Christmas Tree, Here comes Santa Clause, Silent Night, Rudolph, Frosty the snowman, etc) on her organ and we would sing some of the songs together. I was a great time! So, now that I have kids, this is a hard act to follow, but I wanted to do something.
So I decided to start a new family tradition.
On a whim, when my son was 1 and 1/2, we decided to buy a real Christmas tree instead of using an artificial one like I’ve had since I became an adult. Close to where we live is a large family owned tree farm. So I decided to give it a try…, and to my surprise, I was very impressed!
While we could buy a cut Christmas tree there, they also gave you the option of taking a saw and sled and cutting down your own Christmas tree. And this is exactly what I did that first year. Then when we went in to pay for it, we encountered another great surprise. They had Christmas music playing, and had a bunch of chair around an open hearth stove. They then sell popcorn, cookies and hot chocolate. So that is what we did! And to top off everything, they usually have 2 real reindeer in a fenced in area just to add a bit of extra Christmas flavor. It’s truly a great experience!
Since that first year, we have been doing it that way ever since. Now, my son and daughter alternate picking the tree every year making it that much more fun. This year, we are going to take our dog too. We usually wait for it to snow before going to pick out the tree (this is tough sometimes, because we don’t always get snow in December).
Now, you are probably wondering how much my newly created “family tradition” cost… Well since we usually go with the more expense fir trees, so in total, it costs me about $60.00. It’s one of the few times during the year that I’m a spendthrift 🙂
It’s worth it though… Oh, I forgot to mention that on the way to the tree farm, we play Christmas music in the car with the kids singing the songs… It’s a very Norman Rockwell-like experience. Using this activity, I’ve been able to recapture some of the Christmas spirit I encountered as a small child, and hopefully made it magically the same way for my kids.
